The Dutch House — Tong Wang

One week, 7 days, of time passing at precisely the right speed: a beloved speed, a rhythm, pulse of being fully felt, savoured, honoured, enjoyed, treasured, explored, remembered. Hours were not counted, but felt. Felt with ample space in between to process, reflect, rest, recharge. And - felt as some version of ourselves we sincerely, honestly love being, are proud of, are seen, are heard, are ‘real’.

That’s our mini two-person week-long festival. A celebration of just living. ‘Just’ living? Living simultaneously with freedom and control, intention and spontaneity, work and pleasure, quality company and personal space, treasures and laughter in the smallest moments: a soup, a cookie, a long beach walk, a full day massaging kimchi and cutting vegetables, baking mochi, eating mochi, folding tamantaschen on movie night, mini rituals that root the spirit, deep heartfelt talks or short simple remarks that infinitely endear the heart tucked in the most casual spaces between rehearsals and errands and afternoon coffees and homemade dinners and cocktail dates, catching ideas or silly inspirations everywhere, planned adventures, unexpected joys, infinite bondings over minor inconveniences or tiny accomplishments, daily life throwing us jokes, trials, musings, so on and so on…

And the reminiscing. Discovering and re-remembering childhood memories of tastes, smells, textures, joys, pains, people, places and their associated sentiments in new ways, through recreating, retelling, re-exploring with new company -

A ceremony of past-present-future, new discoveries in familiar places, personal or shared, now given new life with a black sesame drink, a book, a remembering of some precious moment from before that is all the more cherished in its collective recollection - ‘do you remember that time when we - ?” a chuckle, an ‘omg’ squeal, a sigh, a disagreement perhaps over some detail in the story.

This trusted blessedness, blessed rhythm to count on, but not taken for granted. That’s the security and groundedness and fluffy cozy endearing comforting warmth of a home, that is not the opposite of surprise or adventure or spontaneity. This Dutch House that builds on memories, from the fragments of all the people and objects that make up its architecture, is building on new memories and sentiments, re-piecing puzzles, lost and found, all taking part in the collage of some kind of curious, ‘meaningful’ whole.

A whole tempo of life that seamlessly binds together all the big and small moments of ‘living’, and everything in between. It’s about everything. The everything that is one thing. The whole picture and all the brush strokes and textures and lines we can or cannot see depending on where we are standing in that particular moment. But that’s the magic of it, there are infinite ways to keep exploring the houses we build from the inside, outside, the upside down, the sideways.

Still grateful, still practicing.

Thank you dearly to all the people I love, you know

Skye.pianist

Ever more curious.
I’ve grown.
I’m stronger. In so many ways. Comfort in discomfort. Capacity for ambiguity. Uncertainty. Practical skills, swiftness and ease and grace in travel. Flexibility. Peace and calm in times of unpredictability and change.
We always find a way to get back on track again. Look, the universe has just enlightened you. Trust, the path has its way of working itself out.
I’m stronger. In softening. In the depth, core of the heart and spirit this giving, loving, compassionate, patient companion, that grounds and roots even in times of movement. This page and this pen, perhaps. The mysterious power of building tiny step by step, word by word. Each repetition, each ritual, each noticing. Each affirmation and acknowledgement of all the beauty in these thoughts, awareness, actions.
I’m going to do what I love to do.
Backwards.
Going forward backwards.
That’s fun.
You see all that’s behind you with broader and broader perspective while still moving in the direction of your path.
Taking time that allows more time. Reflecting to allow time to slow down, thereby somehow adding more time, more honouring of how time is passing.
The building of rituals.
Each window, each household has infinite unspeakable nuances, moments of less than idealized loving cheerful warmth. The silences in between. The tired expressions. The empty spaces. The pauses that speak indecipherable volumes. Waiting to serve. Waiting for someone at the table. The blankness of a stare. The all too familiar pattern of trying to read the gestures, decipher the codes, the tensions, the signs, the atmosphere. Everyone has a mom. Salmon rush. We’re all just leaping salmon.
“Bake. To build a cake in the eye of a storm. Precarious yet bold. Refusal of common sense.”
To tell you everything you’ll never know.
Old friends. The power of reminiscing. The delight of being surprised by what we remember. Back here again. Secret garden. Dutch House. Cooking baking together, biking, movie, popcorn. Tiny kitchen. Cozy. Cozy books, plants, noises. Knus. 温馨
When our routine is disrupted, what do we ground to? How can we make decisions and follow through with choices that still adapt to practicing our joys as we navigate new spaces?
Co-existing.
The healthy dose of practicing myself. What I need and want to be and do in relation to and respect of other people’s spaces and routines.
What do you need to repeat to remember this week?
“Standing your ground.”
As you reconnect with someone whom you love dearly but turned away from, how to navigate a honesty that is brave and gentle and patient and kind?
We’re growing, still.
The privilege of being a ‘poet’. To notice things. All the magic and wonders and awe in the world. To be amazed by the universe. To have the space to allow the universe to enter. Who? Who gets to live like that? What do we do with our privileges?
Wondrous.
These days, the quality company of an old friend that invites you to live an entire day fully, absolutely, honestly, sincerely in the moment, in a contentment that is: life as it should be, without any effort - well, there is the delightful voluntary effort of sharing attention - but without any heavy or burdening force or expectation, to just bee who you are. The peace and calm and blessedness in that. Like home. Like family. As it wants, desires to be. So far from reality. Playing family. Bu this is. Is it.
Letting time unfold with company that will steer your plans off course. Letting that. Being, conversing. There’s a time for everything. These are the days. This is a day. Of moments! Of moments being trusted. Of being proud of living. Feeling like .. a person, a bird, a friend, a joy.
Companionship of memories. The different power when the surprise of what we do remember, the delight, being visited by ourselves with ourselves or with loved ones - that’s the company.
Try matcha + blackberry.
I like warmth.
The absolute magic of a space heater/toasting soft/blanket
Sauna warmth. Feet warm.
Naked, stretching/rolling on bed/with a book.
Pure bliss/calm and sleepy
Toasty/toasty Tong
On Earth.
Briefly.
Wondrous.

5:30 AM

Like pitch black
ink empty
shapeless glittering
hollow powerful
tender universe

That sweetest most
delicate soft piercing

Song
Birdsong
like I’ve never heard before.

So clear, so close, enveloping
rhythms, ungraspable its
so beautiful

The only sense in the dark of
the night. The sentiment of that
sublime song.

Singularity. One phrase chirp
Again.
In the noticing of that beauty/connection to all before and after/who will also notice, and hear

We have all loved
We have all felt each other and/the mysteries and power of the universe across time.

So distant so close, the sweetest pitch vibrations.
That could dare to extend beyond the end of time.

Now do you understand?

So many attempts to freeze time so we can examine it.
Fingers moving, caressing. Freeing. Memory games. Practice, recalling shared realities. Organizing timelines. That’s the fun of it, right? Endless puzzles. If we were just given all the answers, when exactly we did what with whom felt what thought what - then do we still need our memories?
Be comfortable with question marks, unresolved conflicts, issues, and focusing one moment at a time. Living vs. planning. Don’t forget to live while planning to live. Live first.
Having designated slots for these reflections does wonders. Keep practicing. One step at a time, shift your habits. Choose what to remember, and remember with your heart. Lamb. Witch glitter, companionship. Breeze on the bike.
“Memory is a choice.” Is it?
“Madness can sometimes lead to discovery.”
Cute food.
Cute cute, the most endearing expression. Touching, softness, giggles.
Time still
passing
in full.
Wishing this would stay. Contentment, peace, genuine deep rooted, settled, relaxed, trusting, fulfilled ‘happiness’. Happy in the moment, happy in the whole, unburdened by oneself, undistracted by whats to come.
Of course there are still moments when the anxieties creep in, usually with low blood sugar. Body cold, mind numb.
But also the trust that this will change.
Challenges will. Responsibilities are ‘waiting’. Is it then a blessing or curse to be awaited by someone, something? Work, love, friendships demanding our attention, stretching us thin.
The perspective is curious.
That was how we were. Pulled in all directions, demanded of by the world and ourselves to work work work, the burnt out sighs, the touching warmth of a single dinner, company, connections. That was so ‘precious’ and unusual. A painstakingly marked in time to ‘relax’.
And now?
Ordinary.
Profoundly ordinary. That’s blessed. This new normal. The consistency and trust and habit that this is the ‘normal’. A most special normal. All the more special and precious. To have our cake and still want the cake, knowing we want it and we have it and we will and do enjoy each bite. A whole day - massaging kimchi, chatter in the kitchen, running up and down stairs between growth in our music and the rise of our matcha mochi baby in the oven. Cutting with patience. Each ingredient cooked with care. Music, company, food.
Soft, green, squishy.
Sticky life.
Sticky cute life.